Topic. Children upbringing.

CHILDREN UPBRINGING: DIFFICULT KIDS (TOPIC)

When we reach a certain age, we start thinking about children. The most important question and fear is "will I be able to raise a child correctly and how to raise him correctly in General?"

Parenting is a very important and responsible moment in the life of every parent. By raising children, we are educating the future. It is on what we give our children that their future fate may depend.

I think that one of the main goals that a parent should set for themselves is to raise a happy child. When we grow up children we must pay enough attention to them and try to support them in any way. We should show our love not by spoiling our children but by teaching them good things. We must be their best example and explain to them how to behave and treat people in different situations.

Children demand a great deal of attention, time and patience, so, if you are not ready to devote all that to your baby, it is better not to hurry There are many families where both parents keep working after giving birth to their baby It is similar to the situation with a single-parent family, when a father or a mother hardly have enough time and neglect their children's upbringing. In such cases most of the time the child has to spend on his own or with his friends. Due to the fact that he has not got any guidance from his parents he may be involved in some bad companies which commit violence or even crime and become alcohol or drug addicted. When the parents discover that, it's usually too late to change anything.

On the other hand, there is a different situation when the parents treat their children too strict and don't give them any freedom at all. In this case the children may become pariahs among their peers. Constant bans may increase the risk that the child will grow up insolent and defiant. This causes another big problem — lying. The child is forced to lie to the parents because of the fear to be punished. It can be anything from putting on make-up in the girls' room at school to stealing.

Some children rebel against discipline and family values. They listen to a loud music, wear inappropriate, to their parents' mind, clothes, dye their hair in inconceivable colours, have all their bodies pierced and tattooed trying to show their independence and establish their identity. They want to be treated as adults, but they are not ready to take all the necessary responsibilities. It doesn't mean that your child is bad and he will become a criminal. Of course, not! It only means that your child is in his transitional age and he is in need of your understanding and support.

But how to handle such behaviour? Parents should become his close friends. First of all they should learn to respect his interests. Try to speak with him as often as possible, offer some parent-child activities like shopping or going in for sports. It is worth involving the child in discussing some family questions, just to show that he is a full member of the family. Moreover, children in their teens are very vulnerable when they are criticized in public, so try to avoid it. Parents should always be honest and sincere with their child; otherwise it would be unfair to require the same from him.

Too authoritarian parents can't do any good to their children as well as parents who overindulge all the child's caprices. Overindulgence may lead to the same results as negligence. There are parents who are afraid of hurting the child by banning something when it is necessary. Such parents risk becoming powerless in the family and losing control over their children who may become spoiled and capricious.

It demands to make a great effort from both parents and children to reach mutual understanding. There are many different opinions on the question of treating children if they disobey their parents, but every parent should decide for himself what will be best for his child and set him on the right path.

In my opinion, the correct upbringing of a child consists in love, trust, attention and understanding. I want to say that only understanding and love will help to grow a happy person. Parents should be patient and love their children. They should let them make mistakes and learn from them.